GOOD SHEPHERD CHURCH SEMINARY; DOCTOR OF HEALING MINISTRY LESSON THIRTEEN; HEALING YOUR FAMILY TREE

Healing Your Family Tree

      

    Do you know of a troubled family? Have you heard of family difficulties that seem to repeat from generation to generation? I have.

  The healing professions come daily into contact with difficulties stemming from family history.

  Difficulties and toxic situations that can face family members are many; abuse, addictions, assault, insult, divorce, adultery, murder, suicide.

  Can anything be done spiritually about the very real difficulties families face?

Yes, dear Reader, there certainly can.

Family Tree History

Perhaps there is one family on earth which does not experience trouble in one form or another.

  Such a family would not be the norm. Many healers come across cycles of difficulty in families that not only have an emotional or mental disturbance, but also a spiritual dimension.

  Thus we can say that there is a spiritual disturbance within the inherited family memory.

Sometimes a person's behavior or symptoms are part of a recurring pattern that has been around for generations. A familial tendency to alcoholism, depression or anger outbursts may be well known to family members. 

  For example, you may hear an aunt say, 'Yes, the men in our family have always had a temper.'

Sometimes it may be that a legacy of grief, bitterness, violence, sickness, addiction, guilt or poverty consciousness has been passed down through the family generations.

An example of a legacy of grief is a child whose brother or sister died in childhood. However, the survivor is never allowed to discuss the loss.

  He or she reaches adulthood with oceans of tears and heartbreak emotionally locked away and affecting his or her life.

  Another example is that of addiction. Children growing up from infancy exposed to the sight of a parent regularly becoming drunk and violent, may turn to alcohol themselves.

  The pattern that has been established over generations is that alcohol is the medium of choice to turn to as a coping mechanism for daily stress.

  The alcoholism cycle is repeated, and passed on from generation to generation. To break a cycle is not easy.

Troubled Family History

Reader,  sometimes the trouble in family history is unresolved trauma, an addiction problem, or even an occult curse which has been placed on the family.

  Kenneth McCall, the eminent British psychiatrist, was brought up in China as the son of Christian missionaries.

  While there he experienced exorcisms and the influence of generational curses on families.

As McCall matured he studied medicine and specialized in psychiatry. His theory is that, in some cases of emotional and mental disturbance, there is also a spiritual dimension.

  McCall set out to work to find a way to heal the spiritual disturbance within the inherited family memory.

  He started to help family members find healing and reconciliation by means of services for ancestors who had passed on.

  McCall further encouraged prayer for those who have gone before us.

Father Dwight Longenecker believes that real spiritual bonds exist between family members just as strong as the biological, genetic bonds that exist between us and our children, and between us and our ancestors.

  There are many wounds between family members - and none are beyond the power of Jesus Christ to heal.

  Through the mystery of God's fathomless grace, healing will occur between family members and in individual family trees.

  This comes about by the Power of Jesus Christ, Who heals all wounds.

Lingering family sin, addiction, trauma, violence or unresolved death need to be dealt with through services of reconciliation [forgiveness and repaired relationship], and Eucharist [sharing in the Divine Life of God]. 1

The question often arises, can healing come about quickly?

Usually, no. Often the healing is gradual.

  Difficulties and cycles of trauma in the family tree form a complicated network of problems.

This network can consist of emotional, mental and relational problems; the spiritual dimension is often only one factor in this complicated network.

  Each problem needs to be carefully and gradually unpicked to encourage the total healing of the mind, body and spirit.

Family Tree Ministry

Reader, how do we heal imbalances and ongoing disruptive behavior patterns in our family tree?

  Firstly, when we are able to trace our family tree, we meet real - and often deeply flawed - people.

  Some of our ancestors may have led happy, contented lives. Others may have been filled with bitterness, hatred and anger.

  Violence may have disrupted our ancestral tree. Yet others in our family history may have passed on with unresolved feelings of guilt, anger, resentment, fear or remorse.

  However we view our family tree, we live because of our ancestors. Something of the complex tapestry that wove their lives forms part of our heritage today.

Importance of Ancestral Healing

Ancestral healing can help us to understand the past form which we came.

  Instinctive behavior patterns within ourselves can be understood in a new and clearer light.

Old destructive behavior patterns in the family can be identified; with this knowledge we can make different and positive choices.

  By engaging with healing of the past, we free up conditions for the future.

  We can learn compassion and forgiveness, and be less hard on ourselves.

Also, difficult questions about issues of pain and conflict in our families can be answered. 2

What is sin?

'Sin' as used in the Bible made its way from the original manuscript through Greek translation to the form we read today.

  The word 'sin' comes from the Greek word 'hamartia', which literally means - in archery - 'to miss the mark'.

  So, when we draw and notch an arrow, we loose it hoping to strike the center of the board.

If we have difficulties in sighting - or with muscle management - or with emotional discipline, we may sight the target improperly - and miss our mark.

  In other words, we do not succeed. We fail.

How do we fail our relatives in the family tree?

  There are uncountable ways in which we miss our mark - sin - and cause damage to others by the fallout our actions cause.

  Issues that can cause great disruption in the family tree and a miasma of unhappiness to follow in succeeding generations can include;

Loveless or forced marriage

Violence

Hatred

Physical, emotional, sexual, spiritual abuse

Occult practices and curses

Injustice of one generation causing victimization to flower in the next generation

Patterns of addiction such as alcoholism and gambling

Adultery

Rows over land, property, wills

Poor or nil resolution of conflict

Poverty in one generation leading to materialism without value systems in later generations

Unresolved grief in one generation reflecting in later generations

Culture of inappropriate family secrecy covering up problems

Cold family relationships

Early or sudden deaths, stillborns, miscarriages, abortions

Suicide

Cruelty

Tyrannical Behavior

Controlling or domineering behavior

Lack of forgiveness

Scapegoating a family member

Scapegoat

According to the Talmud, Leviticus 16, 3 there is an annual ritual at the Jewish Feast of Atonement - or Yom Kippur. 4

  During this ritual the faults and all the sins of the people were laid on the head of a designated goat.

  The goat was then driven from the Temple into the Edom wilderness; the goat's head branded with scarlet as a badge of shame.

  Almost certain starvation and death awaited the goat after banishment into the desert.

The scapegoat had shouldered all blameworthiness in the community.

  The people, clean once again of their individual and communal shame, had rid themselves of their guilt by means of the ritual.

Scapegoating in another form continues today; it is a determined shifting of the blame and projecting our shadow side onto someone else.

  Society and families often name, blame and shame hapless individuals, while keeping their own house clean.

  Family genograms [the map of relationships in families] often show a scapegoat in every generation.

  A burdened and troubled family member, often rejected, is unconsciously carrying the dark side of what may seem to be a respected family.

  The brighter and more successful the family appears to society, the more their shadow side is projected onto an unfortunate family member. 5

The sad thing is that a bright and happy family member, burdened by the projection of family shame, may learn to displace that shame onto her or himself.

  The result is a crippling of self-esteem, darkening of happiness and hope.

All this may lead to emotional stunting of the family-marked individual.

  Often the 'scapegoating' may be unconscious within the family. The family members are not consciously aware of the generational issues they are carrying out.

  Comments such as 'He was never any good.' 'There was always something strange about her'. 'He left the family under a dark cloud of shame' rationalize the family's ostracization of the scapegoated member.

The scapegoat of the family needs to be aware that this is more about the family unit than about him or herself as an individual.

  The family scapegoat needs to disengage from the blaming process, and disidentify from family projections in order to begin the road to personal recovery.

  The road may be long. Much damage can be done - often quite unwittingly - to individual family members by pigeonholing into predetermined 'family scripts'.

Family Scripts

Often in families, members are given designated identities.

  Examples are, 'This is the bright one of the family.' [The implication being, the rest of the children are not clever]

'She is the beauty of the family' [The other girls are plain]

'Of all my children, he is the one destined to succeed' [He'll make me proud; the others won't]

'You're just like your father; he was useless, and you are too' [I hated your father, and I hate you too]

'You'll never come to anything' [Don't have dreams or ambitions]

All these scripts have one thing in common; they tell you more about the state of mind of the person making the statement, than about the person being addressed.

  The end effect is that the script can emotionally cripple a family member, to the point of causing deep distress and mental illness.

Some family scripts can be passed on from generation to generation; our ancestors' words handed down from one family to the next.

  Family scripts can contain a family member. The scripts have a sound basis for use; they give one family member emotional control over another.

  'Who do you think you are?' [Don't achieve]

'Don't wallow in self-pity' [Feelings are not allowed]

'If you carry on crying, I'll really give you something to cry about' [In this family, we suppress emotions. Tears are not acceptable]

'Wipe that smile off your face' [Humor is not allowed]

'Grown men don't cry' [Don't be normal; hide your tears]

'Don't get too big for your boots' [Stifle your potential]

'You're an idiot' [You're stupid]

'How dare you speak to me in that way?' [I'm superior to you]

'Don't try to pretend you're clever' [Intelligence is suspect]

Healing our Family History

Reader, what does this mean to us? Are the consequences of sin - the behavioral 'missing the mark' - hereditary?

  Are we afflicted by spirits from the past?

The noted theologian Fr John H Hampsch believes that emotional disorders and bodily disease can have roots in past generational transgressions. 6

  

  When a trauma remains unresolved and unheeded in one generation, it has the capacity to generate an ongoing behavior pattern that appears in each succeeding generation.

  There is a growing awareness that trauma often exists in the consciousness of families, communities and cultures in a manner that transcends any one generation.

  Transgenerational Psychology, a healing therapy, deals with events and behavior patterns that can be traced back through several generations with the intention of discovering the original trauma that was responsible for these patterns. 7

  In other words, Reader, often our family tree can give us more than our genetic make-up; it gives us an emotional family inheritance that can be healed by prayer.

Forgiveness and Healing

Forgiveness is essential as a moment in the present, which releases us from darkness of the past and opens up the causeway to a brighter future.

  Often we need to acknowledge past ancestors who have been disowned in the family to bring about peace in our present family.

  Acknowledgement may be needed of family scripts or scapegoating which are limiting and toxic in nature.

  Thus family patterns and interactions can be realigned, and new health enter the ancestral line. 

Sometimes ancestors have been deliberately disowned in bitterness, with actions such as refusal to put up headstones on their graves occurring.

  Present bitterness held in family individuals leads to corrosion of inner spirit. Acknowledgement of past ancestors, such as visiting their graves or putting up headstones, can bring peace to a troubled atmosphere.

  At the very least, inner bitterness in family members may be released and healed.

Understanding for ancestors and present family member is essential for healing of memories and relationships.

  When we visit vengeance on a family member, the fallout may cast long shadows.

Acknowledgement of injustice meted out to past or present family members - with understanding of their situations - is important.

  Understanding and compassion may prevent a deeper split in the family harmony and inter-family relationships.

Forgiveness is the deliberate giving up of resentment and abandonment of all claims against a debtor.

  Guilt over an ungodly deed, or resentment regarding some situation, is a legacy that can be passed from generation to generation.

  Sometimes only the generous gift of full forgiveness and forbearance to claim restitution can cut the emotional and spiritual ties to past misdeeds.

  When we forgive another for that which they did to us causing hurt and harm, we become spiritually and emotionally free to move on.

Ceremony of Healing the Family Tree

It is helpful to draw up a Family Tree. Some - due to adoption - may find themselves unable to detail specifics. However, God knows their ancestry, and their inheritance runs through the adoptee's veins.

  So names and particulars may not be able to be written, but the general sense of the genogram can be put down such as 'birth mother', 'biological father' and so on.

At the bottom of the page, place the names of the present generation in order of appearance from the eldest to the youngest.

  Include miscarriages, abortions, suicides, early deaths, giving names to those previously unnamed.

  Above this line, place the names of father and mother in the place of appearance in the family, [eg firstborn son, third daughter and so on].

  Continue this genogram into earlier generations as far as possible. Next to each member of the family write whatever you know about them, including marriages, separations, affaires, careers, addictions, age, the way they died.

  In the case of adoption, a genogram may include 'Biological father' and 'Biological mother', 'Biological paternal grandfather', 'Biological paternal grandmother', 'Biological maternal grandmother' and so on.

  Have a prayer service - the Eucharist is very helpful - for healing of the Family Tree.

Offer prayers of restitution for the following family members, whether known, or unknown [in some adoptive cases].

  When a family member has died in the state of bitterness or resentment, offer forgiveness on their behalf to close the cycle of bitterness.

  When someone has deeply hurt others and meted out grave injustice, offer prayer of apology. Sometimes restitution is needed.

  Offer prayers of reconciliation.

Offer prayers of restitution where biological family members have damaged the lives of others with their actions.

  In some cases various family members may be so entrenched in anger and bitterness, that they do not wish to reconcile.

  The point is not to affect noticeable healing in all troubled branches of the family at once. The point is by prayer to make the first crack in the ancestral dam wall, which over time and with God's grace will widen, eventually give way, and the grace and healing power of God will spill over into all fields of your family's lives.

  We do not effect the healing; God does. But we may clearly be called to be God's ambassadors in this healing work.

Occult 

Occult influences can cause grave disturbance to family harmony. According to Fr Hampsch, troubles in love, financial problems, marital difficulties, anxieties, tension, depression, obsession, and other sufferings may in some cases be rooted in the forgotten or never-recognized past.

  Hampsch goes on to relate that many people may be afflicted with excessive fears, phobias or aversions. They may suffer from rage, anger, resentment, temper outbursts; overwhelming sense of guilt feelings, addiction to drugs or alcohol. Other difficulties may include types of perversions which are difficult to control, strong temptations to infidelity and many types of relationship problems that affect deep levels of the psyche.

  Most damaging, says Hampsch, is the occult which 'will invariably have serious consequences within the family tree.' 8

  Temper, argumentativeness, and domineering or addictive personalities are frequent residues of psychic phenomena that call demonic entities to a family.

  Stealing, lying, and sacrilegious abuse of sacred objects open the door to demonic infestation and difficulties. Devil worship and occult practices have far-reaching consequence. Hence, occultism often results in family disintegration, feuds, divorce, separation.

  The good news is Jesus Christ. His Power overcomes that of the occult and demonic domain.

Hampsch advises that we need not live under oppressions from the past.

  When people give their lives to GOD and repudiate the sin in their lives, they can dispose GOD to break the curse, and in the place of that, the blessing of the LORD is manifest.

  Those who think they may be troubled by occult traces can pray to recognize such a problem.

Confession with repentance and reconciliation of all sin and failures is important confessing the sins of ancestors [Lev 26;40/ Nehemiah 9;2/ Psalms 106;6] are helpful. 

 Grant forgiveness to all members of the family tree. Pray a deliverance prayer over past generations.

  As GOD to send help through healing angels. Place the Cross of Jesus Christ between each of the generations.

  Ask Jesus to pour His Precious Blood through each stratum between the generations and destroy negative patterns.

  Attend Church service, and lift up all the generations in your family tree before GOD during the Consecration. Remember past, present and future generations in your prayer.

Another powerful time to carry out this lifting up of the genogram is after Holy Communion.

  Frequent reading of the Holy Bible, persistence in personally resisting evil inclinations and frequent recitation of the Lord's Prayer are helpful in spreading positive influence through your genogram. 

  The Lord's Prayer - [the 'Our Father'] - is a prayer of exorcism and a great force of deliverance.

  The ceremony of blessing a house and other areas with holy water when there appears to be demonic infestation or atmosphere is deeply helpful.

And, Finally

Our actions will affect future generations. As healers, let us call on the power of GOD in prayer, and ask Him to help us become holy [ie people of blessing and dedication].

  Reader, GOD might well have given some of us the specific task of breaking our family's pattern of poverty, suffering, ignorance, and perpetuation of destructive patterns such as abandonment or scapegoating.

  Indeed, some of us may be specifically sent to our families in order to guide them into new and life-giving paths of thinking, living and being.

  Let your life provide a new direction for the generations who will follow you.

Bring about change in a loving, gentle and harmonious way. 
  Let the power of Christ's blessing and healing of toxic family patterns flow through you, as healing ambassador, to your family and the world at large.

QUESTIONS FOR THE HEART AND MIND

1. Do you think it is possible for troubled influences to enter a family tree? 

2. Why is it important to build the family as a strong unit?

2. How do you think the negative or positive behaviors of past generations can affect a family?

4. How would you suggest a family strengthen their family tree?

Footnotes

1 http: // patheos.com / blogs/standingonmyhead/ 2014/07/how-can-you-heal-your-family-tree. html

2 Cogley, Fr Jim. 2007. 'Wood You Believe, Volume Three, The Ancestral self.' Poland; Jim P Cogley. Page 9

3 Vayikra - Leviticus - Chapter 16; www. chabad.org / library/ bible_cdo /aid /9917 /jewish / Chapter-16 .htm

4 Yom Kippur - https: // en. wikipedia. org /wiki / Yom_Kippur

5 Cogley, Fr Jim. 2007. 'Wood You Believe, Volume Three, The Ancestral self.' Poland; Jim P Cogley. Page 19

6 http: // motheofgod.com /threads/ can - anyone- give- me - some-insight-into- the-healing -of -the -family - tree.3951

7 Cogley, Fr Jim. 2007. 'Wood You Believe, Volume Three, The Ancestral self.' Poland; Jim P Cogley. Page 29

8.  http: // motheofgod.com /threads/ can - anyone- give- me - some-insight-into- the-healing -of -the -family - tree.3951

REV CATHERINE
Use freely for any worthy purpose

Lesson One
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2014/09/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of.html

Lesson Two
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2015/12/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of.html

Lesson Three
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2015/12/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_52.html

Lesson Four
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2015/12/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_37.html

Lesson Five
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/01/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of.html

Lesson Six
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/01/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_3.html

Lesson Seven
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/01/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_4.html

Lesson Eight
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/03/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of.html

Lesson Nine
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/03/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_15.html

Lesson Ten
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/04/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of.html

Lesson Eleven
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/04/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_4.html

Lesson Twelve
http://lumierecharity.blogspot.ie/2016/04/good-shepherd-church-seminary-doctor-of_5.html

Disclaimer; The information on this post is meant for information only. The information is not meant to replace your Doctor or Health professional or Herbalist care